What?

What? Avocado? Is that boring? I must be out of my mind! Huh? Whaaat? Jersey? Patridge? Sagebrush? Unequivocal? What are you looking for? What are you looking for? What do you want? What kind of words? BB...what did I do wrong? What kind of words do you want?

Works the mind of a DULLARD!

Ship Building in Paradise

Ship building in paradise,
What a fine job that would be,
Basking in the warm sun,
Cutting timber into logs,
Sanding them to a smooth finish,
Poring over fantastic blueprints,
Smudging them with freshly brewed coffee,
Hammering in thousands of nails,
Gently sucking bruised thumbs,
And before you can say "Ahoy, mates!",
You stand before your new home,
Pride filling your belly,
Along with fresh lobster rolls,
And with long awaited anticipation,
You board the unique vessel,
Feeling the cool breeze on your cheeks,
Your wonderful mate by your side,
And sail away into a beautiful sunset,
Finding another paradise all your own.

I was murdered!

The other night, I was innocently laying in bed, when all of a sudden, a blanket was put over my face! By a maniac! I was snoring quite softly (like a locomotive), and the sweet sound was not luring my partner to sleep. I don't know why! My snores are like gentle waves caressing the soft sand on a starry night in Hawaii (like giant monsoons crashing all in sight). Anyway, I felt the blanket on my face, and I was like, oh, she'll take it off. Boy, was I mistaken! Crazy girl! Since I am a trusting fellow, I fell back asleep, with the blanket still over my face! My brain had stopped working (when did it ever work?), and no air was going to my brain to tell me to breathe. So, I was MURDERED! When I told this to my partner the next day, she didn't understand at all what my problem was (do you?). She suggested I go to the police and tell them I was murdered by her, which of course the police would think I was cuckoo. But, by golly, I was murdered! And my Father and Brother understand! And they will keep an eagle eye on her! Murderous partner! Please, someone shut him up for good! Murdered! What a laugh!

Visiting Blogger - BB
In red - BTWC

Buddo, the Green-Eyed Fatso!

Buddo, the green-eyed fatso
had a very little brain.
And if you ever saw him,
you would even say it gleams.

All of the other kitties
used to laugh and call him names.
They never let poor Fatso,
join in any feline games.

Then one foggy misty day,
Owner came to say:
"Fatso with your brain so dim,
won't you fulfill all my evil whims?"

Then all the kitties loathed him
as they shouted out with HISS.
Buddo, the Green-Eyed Fatso,
you'll go down in history!

Fatso got run over by a reindeer...

Fatso got run over by a reindeer,
waddlin' home from our house on Christmas eve,
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and BB, we believe.

He'd been drinkin' too much john slop,
And we'd begged him not to go,
But he'd forgot to fill his tummy,
and he tottered out the door into the snow.

When we found him Christmas mornin',
at the scene of the attack,
He had hoof prints on his forehead,
And incriminatin' Claus marks on his furry back.

Fatso got run over by a reindeer,
Waddlin' home from our house Christmas eve.
You can there's no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and BB, we believe.

Now we're all so proud of BB,
He's been takin' this so well.
See him in there watchin' Seagal,
drinkin' tea and playin' cards with white kitty.

It's so Christmas without Fatso,
All the family dressed in Brights.
And we just can't help but wonder:
Should we open up his gifts on this cheery night?

Fatso got run over by a reindeer,
waddlin' home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and BB, we believe.

Now the ham is on the table.
And the pudding made of fig.
And a green and silver candle,
that would just have matched the color in Fatso's eyes.

I've warned all my friends and neighbors.
"Better watch out for yourselves."
They should always give a license,
to a man who drives a sleigh and plays with elves.

Fatso got run over by a reindeer,
waddlin' home from our house Christmas eve,
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and BB, we believe.

Fatso got run over by a reindeer,
waddlin' home from our house Christmas eve,
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
But as for me and BB, we believe.